i have cried and cried but it dosent take the pain away - Page 2

Send her all the love that's in your soul......
She'll feel its warmth, no matter where you are......
With you all the way........
Pete (Shadow1)

you're going to pull through this! and we are all here to help! I am hoping for the best, for the both of you! Just hang in there and never quit! remember, you will never fail if you never stop trying!

Im truely sorry to hear this man. I hope everything works out for the best. Hang in there, this too shall pass.

i wont pretend i know how you feel, but all i can say man is hang in there and alot of guys here are great guys and willing to help just let us know what we can do.

TIME
It’s often said that time will heal our hurt,
And lead us on to better memories
But tell it to the friend who is in pain,
And sure it is that he will disagree.
I can but try with words to soothe your wounds
And patch you up to face another day
But time will ease the burden and the sounds
Of anguish heard, from many miles away.
So take some time, consider who is here
And give her all the love that’s in your soul,
For time will mark the passing, year by year
Of sadness and the pain you can’t control.
As days go by and dim the rage you feel
The pain will fade to gentle memory-
My words are all I have to help you heal
However well intentioned they may be.
Shadow1 

I wish I had some advice or words of wisdom.  So I'll just send you and your girl my best wishes, and say how lucky your girl is to have you there right now.
 
I agree with the advice that you really need to be strong right now for her.  No matter how much this is tearing you up, she needs to see you being cool and under control.  She needs to focus on her own healing, without having to worry about what you're going through.

Hang in there man-if you really love her then be there like you have been and see if it works out.  My one Cuz just went off the deep end about 2 months ago and should be locked up.  She has been in jail a few times, totaled 2 cars, been kicked out of local stores and bar's, quit college and got married to someone she was only with a very short time just to name a few things she has done.  I know it's not the same, but it hurts and sucks to see someone you care about go off the deep end and become a total mess.  It sounds like you know God so pray for her and yourself as well.

just want let you guys know that i thank you and all advice is being heard.

That sucks man. stay strong and keep looking forward. To me color means nothing. The only people I "hate" is ignorant MFers wether the be white black yellow orange blue. Keep your head up, the only good part about hitting bottom is there is no where to go but up.

it's 2:25pm and i cant wait. come on 5:30 come on 5:30. i think i'm going to leave now and just sit in the parking lot and come up with a game plan to keep myself together. i am so happy right now cause i get to go see her. i will keep all the advice in mind. i dont know if you guys know but i will be taking all of you with me. at this point all of you will be holding my hand and keeping my emotions in line. i'm so anxious and excited.

well didnt go so well. when i got there, i got passed the lobby to go to the unit. the head nurse of the unit said it wasnt a good idea for visitors today. said she wasnt doing so well and that i should call before i come. but in the nicest way possible. i just have to take it one day at a time so i will be back tomorrow. i dropped some things off to her so she will know that i was there. and the nurse knew who i was because she was talking about me. so all and all it sucks but i havent lost the war. i look at it like this: if micheal jordan had a broken wrist during a game and knew that he couldnt hit a shot, what would he do. i cant be the star in the game that is going on with her right now cause i dont know that game so i pass the ball to a team mate (the hospital). but just because i'm not the star player doesnt mean that i cant do my best to set up the shot and if need be sit on the bench with a "go baby" jersey on and clap!!!

well things are looking up guys. i havent been able to see her yet, but the nurse says that she talked to her yesterday.
she said that while they were talking she mentioned my name to her and she started smiling and repeating my name. she said that even in her condition she recognizes my name and that this could be a turning point. this makes me happy to hear, although it sucks not to be able to see her. but i am looking at it like this. we have been coming home to each other everyday since we had some time lay between relocation from when i graduated from mmi. so if i were to see her right now and then get drug away 1.5 hours later i dont know what that would do to her mentally. so for now i wait but if something isnt right i burn the building down ha ha ha.

quote:

ORIGINAL: rider0033
she said that while they were talking she mentioned my name to her and she started smiling and repeating my name. she said that even in her condition she recognizes my name and that this could be a turning point. this makes me happy to hear.

That is a wonderful thing. To be her grounding point is great. Be there for her and love her.

Rider...Just keep focus on the goal man! Don't back down.

most def man. the tears are gone and it's time to fight. with the support of you guys and my family and even my family at work i think i got thru one of the roughest parts. thanks guys and i'll keep you posted. hopefully she just keeps coming back around at this point which means i have to hurry and find an f4i and a new place to stay.

quote:

ORIGINAL: rider0033

most def man. the tears are gone and it's time to fight. with the support of you guys and my family and even my family at work i think i got thru one of the roughest parts. thanks guys and i'll keep you posted. hopefully she just keeps coming back around at this point which means i have to hurry and find an f4i and a new place to stay.

true love cuts through everything .. it will be fine .. stay calm, keep doing what you're doing :-)

Jules

so i saw my baby last night. when i walked in she was eating. when she saw me she had a certain gleem in her eye that i hadnt seen for a couple weeks now. i sat down to feed her and she told me that she didnt like it there. she wanted to know where she was and why was she there. she also said that i cant leave her there which hurt me a lot. but the fact of the matter is that she was actually talking to me. she told me that they give her drugs and thro her in a room. the nurses have told me that she refuses to take her medication so they have to give her shots. they have told me that they have to put her in solitary cause she bothers other patients (i do remember that she gets very aggressive right now, she did send a nurse to the ememrgency room). as much as it breaks my heart to hear her tell me these horror stories, the facility staff tells me the same story so i know that they are not lying. and because of the fact that she was able to hold a conversation with me tells me that the treatment is working. but still i feel......... i dont think i know how to put my feelings into words at this point. 

by the way i found an f3 so that i can get to her as quickly as possible (i think i feel a little guilty about enjoying the ride). and she loves riding as well. and i might have found a place in rancho cucamonga. 

Maybe when she gets a little better she can go on a nice, relaxing and theraputic ride on the bike somewhere. 

my thought exactly! pacific coast highway on a sunday right around 11:00am. the best!!!

Let her feed off your confidence.  If she sees that you believe she's strong enough to get through this, then she'll start believing it too.
 
Hang in there, for both of your saske.

hey bro...hit me up if you make it to RCM. I'm down in SD but I know me and my friends are always looking for an excuse to bust out a road trip on the bikes.

sure thing and it might be sooner than i thought. saw her today and man is she improving. i asked how she was doing and she told me she was fighting it out. my girl=my new hero

quote:

ORIGINAL: rider0033

sure thing and it might be sooner than i thought. saw her today and man is she improving. i asked how she was doing and she told me she was fighting it out. my girl=my new hero

Oh such wonderful news :-) ...

everything comes good, you just have to keep believing and keep doing what you're doing .. don't falter!


Jules

well current status is:
found the f3 (this will really make life better for her)
found a nice place to stay in pamona (she will really feel more at ease with this place)
now she just has to fight her fight. i will continue to support, show up for every visit, and cheer her on but this is the part
that only god and her can take care of. i continue to pray.....